Sky Atlantic Transgender drama is Hit not a Miss.

Sky Atlantic’s first UK produced drama is a triumph. It’s gritty, unashamed and unlike anything you will have seen before. On paper Hit & Miss  may sound like a convoluted tale of a transgender, hit woman who struggles to make her way in the world but what makes this new 6-part drama so wonderfully fresh and different is the fact that once you know all that it breaks off into something completely unexpected and becomes more about the sweet and heartwarming relationship between the family. Debs Hunt of InsideMediaTrack takes a look at Episode 2.

Mia’s attack on the deplorable John (Vincent Regan) last week has left its mark in more ways than one, placing the family in a sticky situation as revenge he now seeks. He plans to get it by selling the small holdings – an upset the kids don’t want after the recent death of their mother. Forced to talk to John, Mia offers to buy the small holdings off him –  which he has no intention of doing. So in steps her now bordering-on-creepy boss Eddie (Peter Wight), who offers to use his name to buy the property. However Eddie’s motives seem shady somewhat when it appears clear he intends to get his feet firmly under the table; and his stash hidden in the house. Is Eddie protecting his investments in his best assassin? Not to mention his leering looks in Mia’s direction.

But what’s really interesting is the family dynamic. When you hear the premise is a transgender assassin you expect an action fest (well the assassin part anyway). What we actually have is something profoundly more beautiful.  Amongst the chaos and arguments, there are genuine poignant moments of emotion. Especially between Mia and Ryan. During a bout of confusion where he dresses in drag (so he can be more like Mia). Mia tenderly points out to him how much he is already like her…but will grow to be a man.

Hit and Miss is Sky Atlantic's first UK drama series

What is becoming clear is the teenagers are testing Mia. Riley who is clearly pregnant after her aggressive sex sessions with John, points out to Mia;  ‘They say you can choose your friends but not your family. Thing is, you can.’ Asking Mia;  ‘Are you going to run away every time it gets a bit tough?’ While Levi (Reece Noi) has trouble no longer being “the man” of the house and throws insults at Mia in his frustration and grief, before breaking down for a hug. Young Leoni (Roma Christensen) cleverly points out to Mia “why aren’t you,” when Mia asks why she doesn’t want to dance in her dance class.  What a splendid cast of youngsters Hit and Miss has!

This weeks uncomfortable scene; and what must have been fairly mortifying for Sevigny to film, serves to show us Mia’s self-loathing of her male self,  as she stands naked in front of the mirror in a Pinocchio nose while punching herself in the groin repeating the mantra; ‘I don’t want to be a boy.’ A reality she may be facing sooner rather than later, if she intends to start seeing the unwitting Ben (Jonas Armstrong).

With Mia’s professional and personal lives now getting blurred, how much can she keep her family out of trouble? Going by the sniper gun she used on the fox, I think our long-haired prowler should cut his losses, before the farm becomes her very own shooting range, with him being the moving target!


Chloë Sevigny‘s accent may be shaky (I still don’t understand why she had to be Irish, or why she couldn’t keep her real accent) but Hit and Miss so far is firmly in the hit category for me, with the second episode even better than the first.  The final scenes with the family dancing in the kitchen were not only heartwarming, but amazingly filmed. There was an air of Pulp Fiction in them. I’m hooked what happens to this troubled family, while watching some impressive acting from all ages. There’s not too many shows that can make me praise them so much, so here’s hoping Hit and Miss can keep up the standard set. Episode 3 can’t come soon enough.

Hit & Miss continues Tuesday's at 10.00pm on Sky Atlantic 

Contributed by Debs at Inside Media Track

Follow Debs on Twitter.

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The TVWEEK: Saturday 2nd -Friday 8th June 2012

Saturday
7.20pm The Voice Final BBC1 - The remaining acts fight to win the ailing singing competition.
7.30pm You Can't Be Serious! ITV - Sports-themed entertainment show with impressionist and sports fanatic Alistair McGowan. The programme skewers all the funniest, quirkiest and silliest moments from the week's televised sport using a mix of clips, sketches and impressions.
9.00pm The Greatest Footie Ads Ever! ITV - Paddy McGuinness presents a show featuring the most incredible, bizarre, spectacular and most-loved football related adverts.

10.05pm Robin Gibb: Me and My Songs, A Tribute BBC2 - The late Robin Gibb reflects on his songs and the extraordinary career of the Bee Gees in of the last filmed interviews he gave to the BBC, from January 2011. 

10.40pm The Apprentice: Why I Fired Them BBC1 - Lord Sugar sheds light on each of the firings from this year's Apprentice.

Sunday

1.30pm The Diamond Jubilee Thames Pageant BBC1 - Huw Edwards, Matt Baker and Sophie Raworth host live coverage of one of the biggest events of the year, the diamond jubilee Thames pageant. For the first time in 350 years, a flotilla of 1,000 boats will sail down the River Thames from Battersea to Tower Bridge in celebration of Her Majesty the Queen's 60-year reign. 

7.30pm Gary Barlow: On Her Majesty's Service BBC1 - Documentary following Gary Barlow, who is on a mission to record a special song to celebrate the Queen's diamond jubilee. He writes the melody with Lord Lloyd Webber, but he wants performers from around the Commonwealth to play on it. Prince Charles gives Gary some suggestions, and Gary then embarks on an extraordinary trip, recording all manner of musicians on their home turfs to make the unique record, Sing. Musicians include a children's choir in Kenya, Rastafarian drummers in Jamaica, the Sydney Symphony Orchestra in Australia, pan-pipers in a remote rainforest village on the Solomon Islands, and Gareth Malone's Military Wives Choir in the UK. Gary also manages to get Prince Harry to make his own musical contribution. A record like this has never been attempted before, and the pressure is on for Gary, as he has a royal appointment to present it to the Queen herself. 

8.00pm Superscrimpers: Hot Summer Tips Channel 4 - In this SuperScrimpers Jubilee summer special Mrs M reveals her top ten sizzling money-saving summer tips from one of Britain's top holiday destinations - Brighton.

8.30pm The Apprentice: The Final BBC1 - After 12 tasks Lord Sugar hires his business partner for the 2012 series.

Monday

7.30pm The Diamond Jubilee Concert BBC1 - In the presence of HM the Queen and the royal family, an array of stars from the last sixty years of rock, pop and classical music perform on a spectacular stage built around the Queen Victoria Memorial, right in front of Buckingham Palace. Hit songs and show stopping performances are promised, with hosts including Rob Brydon, Miranda Hart, Lenny Henry and Lee Mack. Proceedings conclude with HM the Queen lighting the National Beacon. 

Tuesday

8.00pm Big Brother: The Auditions Five - Special programme showing exactly what it takes to get into the Big Brother house. Presenter Jamie East joins the Big Brother auditions as they travel the country in search of this summer's crop of housemates. 

9.00pm The Transit of Venus: A Horizon Special BBC2 - Liz Bonnin presents a Horizon special about a rare and beautiful event in our solar system that we should all be able to see for ourselves - the transit of Venus across the face of the sun. It will start just after 11pm of the 5th of June 2012 - and won't happen again for more than a century. Joined by scientific specialists from across a wide range of specialisms, Liz explores the history and significance of this rare event as well as revealing how Venus itself has transformed our understanding of life on Earth - and the possibility of life beyond it. 

9.00pm Martin Clunes: The Lemurs of Madagascar ITV - Martin Clunes travels to the island of Madagascar to investigate the fate of the world's last surviving lemurs. Lemurs live only on this beautiful island and, species by species, they are disappearing. In this moving film, Martin meets those who are trying to protect this wonderful creature from extinction and, although he is saddened by what he sees of the destruction of the lemurs' natural habitat, he is inspired by the dedicated work of the conservationists. He also travels to the Betampona nature reserve in a bid to track down some captive-bred black-and-white ruffed lemurs, which were brought there in 1997 in hopes that they would mate with the wild population.

9.00pm Big Brother Five - Brian Dowling hosts a new set of housemates enter the infamous Big Brother House. 

10.00pm All in the Best Possible Taste with Grayson Perry Channel 4 - Grayson Perry, one of Britain's leading artists and winner of the Turner Prize, has always been fascinated by taste - why people buy the things they do, wear the things they wear and what they are trying to say about themselves when they make those choices. In this three-part series, Perry goes on safari through the taste tribes of Britain, not just to observe our taste, but to tell us in an artwork what it means. The work he'll be creating is a series of six imposing tapestries called 'The Vanity of Small Differences' - his personal but panoramic take on the taste of 21st century Britain. In each episode, he'll embed himself with people from across our social spectrum - the working classes of Sunderland, the middle classes of Tunbridge Wells and the upper classes of the Cotswolds - in a bid to get to grips with our differing takes on taste.

Wednesday

9.00pm The Secret History of Our Streets BBC2 - Charles Booth's vast 1886 survey of London ranks each one of London's streets according to the class of their residents. This series returns to six archetypal London streets visited by Booth to discover how their fortunes have ebbed and flowed over the last 125 years 

10.00pm Bedlam SkyLiving - The supernatural series returns with a talented new cast led by Lacey Turner. Bedlam Heights has been renovated, but its unearthly residents continue to torment. 

Thursday 

9.00pm William at 30 ITV - As Prince William, the Duke of Cambridge, turns 30, Suranne Jones narrates this special one-off documentary taking a look at his life so far 

9.00pm The House the 50s Built Channel 4 -  Four-part series that celebrates the science behind the inventions and innovations that transformed the way we used to live, and catapulted an exhausted, post-war country into the modernity of 1950s Britain. Engineer and showman Professor Brendan Walker sets out to discover the ingenuity and life-changing technology behind the inventions that took drab, black and white post-war Britain and launched it, under its new young Queen Elizabeth II, into a Technicolor-drenched world of the future. Brendan learns from practical, hands-on experience exactly what it took to bring about the 50s revolution by reconstructing a house. Each episode focuses on a room and fast-forwards it through the 1950s, showcasing how progress in the home triggered a tsunami of social change. 

9.00pm Marco Pierre White's Kitchen Wars Five - Series that sees the celebrity chef on the hunt for Britain's best restaurateurs. He begins in his hometown of Leeds, setting up his mobile kitchens in the city centre. The chefs have 30 minutes to cook and showcase their best dishes. But it is not just the famous Michelin-starred chef who needs impressing, Marco also asks members of the public to exercise their taste buds to help him to find the victorious couple. 

Friday 

9.00pm Alan Carr's Summertime Spectacular Channel 4 - Alan Carr has been left in charge of Channel 4 HQ and is set to throw the mother of all summer parties! Alan's unique warm hospitality and infectious personality shine through in this party with a difference as he celebrates everything from the Jubilee to the great British summer holiday. A plethora of celebrity guests join Alan for the two hour extravaganza in various guises including sketches, entertaining and ridiculous games. Plus there's a host of top musical performances and audience participation in the studio. Alan's guests include David Walliams, Justin Bieber, The Saturdays, the cast of Made in Chelsea and Rizzle Kicks

Custardtv Podcast. Bafta's, Hit and Miss and BBC cuts.

For our most recent Podcast we discuss the cringeworthy aspect of The Baftas, the continual brilliance of Silk and Sky Atlantic's first UK made drama Hit & Miss.

Enjoy!

The TVWEEK: Saturday 26th -Friday 1st June 2012

Saturday
8.00pm Eurovision 2012 BBC1 - Graham Norton provides commentary on the 2012 Eurovision Song Contest from Baku in Azerbaijan, winners of the 2011 contest. Engelbert Humperdinck flies the flag for the United Kingdom, performing first with his soaring ballad Love Will Set You Free, written by award-winning songwriters Martin Terefe and Sacha Skarbek. He is one of 26 acts competing for the coveted title of Eurovision Song Contest winner 2012.

9.00pm Sebastian Bergman BBC4 - Swedish crime thriller. Brilliant, difficult and politically incorrect, Sebastian Bergman is one of Sweden's leading police profilers. His life and and career are on the skids when he returns to his home town, two weeks late for his mother's funeral but just in time to help the local police solve the brutal murder of a 15-year-old boy. 

Sunday

6.00pm Soccer Aid ITV - Dermot O'Leary and Kirsty Gallacher introduce live action from the fourth Soccer Aid match in aid of UNICEF as a host of celebrities and footballing legends take part in this charity event from Old Trafford. Robbie Williams captains an England side which takes on Michael Sheen's Rest of the World team. Dermot will be talking to some of the players taking part as they gear up for the match, and there will be a series of reports by Ewan McGregor, Keira Knightley and Eddie Izzard highlighting how the money raised is used around the world. Among those taking part in the match are Harry and Jamie Redknapp, Jason Isaacs, Paddy McGuinness, Olly Murs, David Seaman, Gordon Ramsay, Gerard Butler, James McAvoy, Will Ferrell, Mike Myers and Teddy Sheringham. 

8.00pm The TV BAFTA Awards BBC1 - Dara O Briain hosts the British Academy Television Awards from the Royal Festival Hall in London.  

Monday 

7.30pm How to Beat Pain BBC1 - Dr Jack Kreindler and Professor Greg Whyte tackle pain - one of the most common complaints in Britain. To reveal key facts about chronic back pain, osteoarthritis and acute pain, and give insight into how these debilitating conditions can be treated, these medical mavericks use each other as human guinea pigs in fun and often painful experiments 

8.00pm The Queen & I ITV - Two-part documentary that focuses on home movie footage of the Queen and the public celebrations of her reign recorded by members of the public. Featuring previously unseen archive footage, the films provide a fascinating snapshot of British life over the past six decades. 

9.00pm Afghanistan: The Great Game - A Personal View by Rory Stewart BBC2 - 3-part series that tells the story of British interventions in Afghanistan in the 19th century, when the British Empire became obsessed with the idea that their rival, Russia, was considering the invasion of Afghanistan as a staging post for an attack on British India. It was a period of mutual suspicion and paranoia that later became known as "The Great Game". Afghanistan was perceived by Victorian Britain, as it's believed to be today, to be an immediate threat to British national security. In this first film, Rory Stewart tells the story of the decision-making that led to the first British invasion of Afghanistan, and the three Anglo-Afghan wars fought in this era. And he tells the story of Afghanistan's unlikely reaction to this period. When an Afghan-elite made a futile attempt to impose western-inspired ideas and modernity on the country. Concludes Wednesday.

9.00pm Britain's Hidden Homeless BBC3 - When she was 19, Mercury Prize-winning rap artist Speech Debelle walked out of her family home and became homeless for three years. In this documentary, she shows that being homeless isn't just about down and outs sleeping in cardboard boxes, but is a problem which affects more and more young people in Britain today. Speech gets to know four young people from very different backgrounds - all of them sofa surfing or sleeping rough - as they try to find a more permanent roof over their heads. She discovers that councils and charities are struggling to cope with this growing crisis and she investigates the impact on young people's lives. 

9.00pm Revenge E4 - Soapy US drama. Emily Thorne is the newest arrival in the Hamptons. She appears to be a friendly and sophisticated 'girl next door', but has a dark family history and is not what she seems. Seventeen years ago, her father was framed for a crime he didn't commit by neighbours he trusted, and sentenced to life in prison. Emily never saw him again and spent her childhood consumed by rage, loss and betrayal. Now she's returning under an assumed identity with just one goal - revenge - and every social overture she makes is a carefully planned chip at the foundation of her sworn enemies. 

10.35pm Born in the USSR: 28 Up ITV - In the tradition of the Seven Up! series, this film follows eight individuals whose early lives were spent behind the Iron Curtain. Now aged 28, they give a personal insight into life in Russia today. 

Tuesday

9.00pm Jimmy & The Giant Supermarket Channel 4 - Animal welfare standards might have come a long way in the UK, but most of the country's chickens are still reared intensively, 60% of pigs still spend their whole lives in sheds, and tens of thousands of dairy calves are needlessly slaughtered each year because it's too expensive to rear them. But in these cash-strapped times, a lot of customers can't afford to care about free range food. Rare breed pig farmer Jimmy Doherty has a dream to make free range food affordable for everyone. So he's challenged Britain's biggest supermarket, Tesco, to let him prove he can do it, and they've agreed. He's taking on three of Tesco's best-selling own brand products and will work with the company to try and make higher-welfare versions for the same affordable price. 

9.00pm Prince Charles: The Royal Restoration ITV - Alan Titchmarsh presents a documentary following Prince Charles and his team as they try to save Dumfries House, one of Scotland's most important stately homes.

10.35pm The Apprentice: The Final Five BBC1 - Programme that takes a closer look at the five remaining apprentice hopefuls.

Wednesday

Continuing Series Include:Lewis 8.00pm ITV

                                         The Apprentice 9.00pm BBC1

                                        24hrs in A&E 9.00pm Channel 4

                                     The Killing USA 10.00pm Channel 4 

Thursday

8.00pm Britain's Lost Routes BBC1 - Griff Rhys Jones goes on a Tudor adventure as he retraces the route that Queen Elizabeth I took through the Cotswolds and into the West Country on what was one of her regular 'progesses' through her realm. Winding through the heart of some of England's most stunning countryside he tracks her journey from Windsor to Bristol. Griff reconstructs the enormous baggage train the queen took with her; he tries out some Elizabethan forms of transport, and visits some of the stunning castles and stately homes she visited. He discovers what the queen ate, how she slept and what amused her in a trip that was as much about politics as it was about leisure. Unearthing gems of tudor architecture that she would have seen, recreating a sense of the landscape she would have enjoyed, and digging up actual accounts of her visits to the towns, Griff gets a sense of the nation's love and adulation for the great queen, and the excitement, expense and logistics that lay behind this early royal walkabout. 

9.00pm Married to the Moonies Channel 4 -  Documentary that goes inside the little known world of the Unification Church, commonly known to outsiders as the Moonies, and follows three British youngsters as they travel to Korea to be blessed by their messiah, Reverend Moon, at one of the movement's controversial mass weddings. The three undertake a condensed courtship - meeting and making plans for the future with a person they hardly know. Twenty-two-year-old psychology student Elisa has decided to make her own wedding dress for the big day. Twenty-one-year-old Reamonn has been matched with a girl from Argentina he hasn't even met. The cameras follow him to the airport as he meets his future bride for the first time. And 20-year-old Naomi from south London is matched with her future husband just days before the ceremony. 

9.30pm Live at the Electric BBC3 - Live Standup from Russell Kane interspersed with sketches from other comedic talent.

Friday

8.00pm A Jubilee Tribute to the Queen from Prince Charles BBC1 - To launch the diamond jubilee weekend, His Royal Highness the Prince of Wales presents a personal tribute to Her Majesty the Queen. Through previously unseen photographs and cine films from Her Majesty's private collection - many of them shot by the Queen herself - the prince reflects on various public events and private family moments during the sixty years of the Queen's reign. In some cases, the prince himself has never seen the footage before. The prince is filmed in the private quarters of Windsor Castle and Balmoral, as well as at Buckingham Palace and Highgrove. 

9.00pm Elizabeth: Queen, Wife & Mother ITV - Alan Titchmarsh presents an intimate portrait of the Queen by those closest to her. The Duke of Cambridge speaks of her as 'grandmother first, queen second', while the Duke of York and the Princess Royal talk about what it was like to grow up 'above the shop' at Buckingham Palace with a mother who had to juggle the pressures of her job with the responsibilities of a young family. The programme also features private archive footage of the Queen as a young girl as well as rare access to family letters. 

9.00pm Punk Britannia BBC4 - Opener of a three-part documentary series about the history of punk rock. The film explores the road to punk in Britain, which begins in the early 70s with a young generation already conscious that they have 'missed the 60s party' and are stuck in a Britain heading for economic woes and dwindling opportunities. But before the punk generation finally arises to have its say during 1976 come a group of pub rockers, a generation of bands sandwiched between 60s hippies and mid-70s punks who will help pave the way towards the short, sharp shock of punk, only to be elbowed aside by the emergence of the Sex Pistols, the Clash et al. Pub rock set the template - small venues, fast retro rock n roll and bags of attitude typified bands like Dr Feelgood, Ducks Deluxe, Kilburn and the High Roads and Eddie and the Hotrods. Featuring unseen archive footage and interviews with John Lydon, Paul Weller, Mick Jones, Wilko Johnson, Nick Lowe, Adam Ant, Brian James and many more 

Custardtv Live: Rinsing Guys, Silk, The Voice and the end of House

Here is our latest TV chat about BBC drama Silk, the continuous demise of the Voice and Gary chats to a guest about Channel 4's latest Shock Doc.

High praise for The Bridge

These days, Nordic thrillers are reaching our shores in an invasion to rival the Vikings circa AD800. The latest import, Danish-Swedish collaboration The Bridge, came to an end on BBC4 on Saturday night.

You may or may not agree that the series was better than The Killing, but it was certainly a rollercoaster ride.

Key to its success was the warm partnership between Malmo police’s almost-certainly-on-the-autistic-spectrum Saga Noren and laidback Danish investigator Martin Rohde. As with all the best crimefighting duos, this pair played off each other’s strengths and weaknesses beautifully, while bringing a generous helping of dark Scandinavian humour to what might otherwise have been a rather wearing series of unpleasant murders.

Refreshingly, their relationship was given room to breathe. I’m so tired of shows that trumpet the fact they don’t show their protagonists’ private lives, as if that’s something to be proud of. Certainly these scenes shouldn’t be allowed to take over a drama, but if you have no sense of a character outside their working environment, it’s very hard to care about that person.

Sharing Saga and Martin’s banter, and seeing their interaction with friends and family, meant that I was on the edge of my seat when August was kidnapped, and nervily distrustful of too-good-to-be-true Anton.

Minor characters were fully fleshed-out, too. I can’t be the only one who was bereft when poor, gutsy Anja was gunned down, or left in despair when homeless Bjorn’s escape attempt was foiled.

Character development was just the icing on the cake, though, for The Bridge also functioned very successfully as a thriller. The questions came thick and fast, greedily devoured by its savvy audience: not only whodunnit, but why did Charlotte choose to wear that wig? Could the killer be a cop? Who was August chatting to online? And how on earth did Martin manage to have sex with Charlotte so soon after being kicked in the, ahem, vasectomy scars?

I tremble at the thought of a UK-French remake of The Bridge. It’s so lazy to try to replicate a success purely by copying its format. Far better to take the lessons The Bridge and its stablemates have taught us and apply them to original British dramas:

Don’t try to shoehorn a story into an hour or two – take ten, if you need them. Give the audience engaging protagonists and scatter a few laughs around. You can put a woman in charge without having her constantly question if it’s OK for her to be in charge.

I can see how some of these things would enliven future series of Taggart, Lewis and Scott & Bailey, to name but a few.


Meanwhile, there will be quite a delay until series two of the original, which begins shooting later this year and isn’t scheduled for broadcast until autumn 2013. But good things come to those who wait…

Contributed by Laura Pledger  Follow Laura on Twitter


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Lewis: Still solving murders, six series’ on

" Lewis and Hathaway are Oxford’s answer to Batman and Robin"

Settling down in front of the TV last night, we were treated to some magnificent rooftop views of Oxford courtesy of the opening titles of the new series of Lewis. Swiftly followed by shots of a young couple punting on the canal and a group of botanists discussing their work in the early morning sunshine

With all this peaceful scenery it’s almost possible to forget that in order for Inspector Lewis to make an appearance (something which is pretty much a given, since the programme is named after him) some sort of murder or similar wrongdoing must shortly be about to take place.

Then, with the tranquility of the setting at full throttle, the woman leading the group of botanists announces, “Today we’ll be digging up ‘Rhododendron Ponticum’ as the rest of the group scatter across the forest. Suddenly we’re acutely aware of the likelihood of one of them digging up something a bit more lively than a rhododendron something-or-other. The discovery of a buried body (let’s be honest, not entirely unexpected) signifies to the viewer the start of a long and complicated murder investigation (when is it ever simple?) and inevitably requires the assistance of… that’s right, you guessed it… Lewis and his faithful Sergeant Hathaway.

It strikes me that Lewis and Hathaway are Oxford’s answer to Batman and Robin. Lewis has all the braun, and by braun I don’t mean hard muscle (he’s too busy policing to spend any length of time in the gym), I’m referring to the weight and power of his position within the police force. He’ll knock down people’s doors and sniff out a villain from miles away, but it’s Hathaway who has a lot of the brains, and may I say the beauty (pause for swoon). In fact, there doesn’t seem to be much he doesn’t know.

Having thought about it, Hathaway may be not be Oxford’s answer to Robin at all, more Oxford’s answer to Einstein. And it seems ironic that academically apprehensive Lewis ended up with a Sergeant who can not only speak Latin, but also seems to be an expert on Theology, Philosophy and ancient Lewis Carroll poems.

Wednesday saw the start of series six (series seven has already been commissioned by ITV). The episode is hinged on the efforts of several students and professors to find the meaning and elusive ‘answer’ to Lewis Caroll’s theological poem, ‘The Hunting of the Snark’ and our Inspector strongly believes that the poem will lead them to the murderer. In every other part of the country people are usually murdered because of drugs, money or violence. In Oxford however, it only takes a work of fiction and some angry students eager to get into the prestigious Wednesday Club to send you to an early grave, so watch out.

At any other university a club on a Wednesday would usually constitute some sort of sports club. However, something tells me Oxford University’s Wednesday club for geniuses does not consist of rugby players drinking pints through each other’s dirty socks.

Celia Imrie makes a triumphant entrance to the episode after DI Innocent (Rebecca Front) warns Lewis and Hathaway of a ‘nutcase alert’ at the station. Cue Imrie as Michelle Marber, an incessant police nuisance, chattering away about conducting her own ‘wider investigation’. In fact, it is Imrie’s emotional development of her character that really makes the episode, she even manages to coax Lewis into discussing his grief over his late wife; something he usually keeps bottled up.

Although the main plot lacks a little ‘oomph’, the sub plot centred around Celia Imrie’s character, as well as Lewis and Hathway’s various interactions with her, really help to drive the story forward. Some brilliant acting from the main and guest casts, but whilst this episode is not the most gripping or exhilarating, I still have my faith in Lewis and Hathaway’s crime solving abilities because let’s be honest, there hasn’t been a pairing like them since Batman and Robin.

• Early ratings show Lewis returned with 5.21million but was beaten by The Apprentice.
• ITV have already commissioned a seventh series to air in 2013

Lewis continues Wednesday's 8.00pm on ITV

Contributed by Vicki Greenfield Follow Vicki on Twitter

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TheCustard chats to property expert and Secret Agent Phil Spencer

Thursday sees the next episode of the new prime time series from property guru Phil Spencer.  Phil Spencer: Secret Agent sees Phil comes to the rescue of homeowners desperate to sell their homes. It's an idea that was first introduced as part of Channel 4 daytime but following a huge success there and with repeats on More4 Channel 4 has moved (if you can pardon the awful pun) this new series to prime time. I recently spoke to Phil about the series and why he thinks we're all so fascinated by property programmes on TV.

Are you happy the series has been moved to a night time slot?
Yes! I was delighted! It did really well in the daytime slot, doubling the usual audience for that time and then the repeats on More4 did really well for them so we've got five to do for prime time. It brings a bit of extra pressure but it also brings extra exposure to the series and to what I'm doing and it also means we get a bit of extra time and extra money to make the show. 

This series requires you to be brutally honest with people. Do you find that difficult?
Yes. Of course it's awkward because I do surprise them, they don't know I'm going to be there and I need to be straight with them  I'm very sensitive to the fact that I have only just met them and I'm standing in their house explaining why the house that they've lived in and loved isn't selling. I try and tackle it politely but at the same time very honestly. People seem to take it from me but I'm not being rude; I'm being objective. I'm not being offensive or personal about the way the choose to live their lives.

Do you ever think surely this is common sense why this is still sat on the market?
Yes I do. I've looked around a vast number of houses in my career so it is common sense to me but I think when it's your own house it is often difficult to see the wood for the trees. People are looking at their house as a stage set and I come along and try to help them set that stage. Often in this series the people I'm meeting are desperate and they've been trying to sell their home for a long period of time and of course it's often difficult to keep up the enthusiasm and the momentum to keep everything neat and tidy for a viewing when you might have had fifty viewings! A lot of what I do is pointing out the obvious.   


Yes and you can do that without being rude
Yes. I'm on their side. I'm there to help them get the most for their most valuable asset. The house is most likely the most valuable thing they own so you want to get the best for it. I was with a couple from Kent  who you'll see in a few weeks time and I explained them you've got two choices: do nothing to the house and take twenty grand off the price, or spend a week or two dressing it up for sale and make twenty grand. I put to them would you go to work for two weeks of twenty grand? Of course you would! 


How do you feel being tough without your TV wife by your side?
(Laughs) well my TV wife is sometimes less delicate and polite than I am.  She calls it like it is!

Phil with TV wife Kirstie Allsopp.

In 2011 you celebrated ten years of Location, Location, Location. Did you think ten years ago you would still be filming property programmes? 
No! Ten years ago I thought we were still on screen in a month it would be fantastic! It's been a very fun time. It was a very surreal start. It certainly wasn't something either Kirstie (Allsopp) or I ever imagined we'd be doing. 


You didn't start out as a TV presenter did you?
No. I never had any dreams or aspirations of becoming a TV presenter. I trained as a surveyor, I ran a home-finding business and I got call to consult on the format on Location, Location. Somebody thought that what I did at that consultation was worth doing a screen test.  They called me back and one thing led to another. 


Does the process of finding people homes still excite you?
Yes. I think it's a fascinating process. I've been doing it for fifteen years now and I still get a huge sense of satisfaction and fulfillment out of helping people buy or sell. 


What do you think makes these shows so appealing to the viewer?
I like the format of Location, Location and Secret Agent. There are ups and downs and there are serious decisions that need to be made.  There's money at stake and there's usually discussion, indecision and stress and that's always quite interesting for me to be involved in at such close quarters and equally for people to watch.


Were you ever concerned that the "Credit Crunch" could spell the end of property series on TV?
There was a time back in 2009 where we were concerned and wondered whether people would still watch property shows. In 2005, 2006, 2007 watching property on TV made people feel good, happy and wealthy but suddenly in 2009 it made them feel nervous. We thought will people want to watch these shows with all hell breaking loose with the market? As it turned out our viewing figures in 2009 increased. We put it down to the fact that people were cautious, worried and very concerned about making the wrong decision so I think they were watching the show for advice and guidance. 


What do you tend to get asked the most?
If I'm filming on my own the most frequent question is where's Kirstie? If Kirstie's filming on her own it's where's Phil? We often get asked where Kirstie buys her shoes from. Doing what we do is slightly like being a doctor. Ii is such an important decision and it isn't something people do very often so people always have questions about the process. There's an abundance of questions really and I'm always happy to try and help. I enjoy helping people with this big part of their lives.


How long do you think you could continue making these shows? Could I be talking to you in five years time and asking you about the property market?
I hope so Luke I really do. I always say if people carry on watching it then we'll carry on making it. We enjoy working together and we enjoy our separate shows as well and I still genuinely get a kick out of helping people make that big decision. When we first started doing the revisits I never used to like doing those. For the first few years Kirstie did all the revisits because I enjoyed going out, finding the house, doing the deal and that's that. When Kirstie went on maternity leave Channel 4 asked me to do some revisits and I rather begrudgingly said OK. I realised that going back into people's lives, two or three years after we've found them house and being welcomed back with open arms was lovely.  They say they would have never found this house, never had done that deal and it's all worked out! That is an incredibly satisfying and fulfilling thing.  It is a nice conclusion to the story. They bought but are they happy? 


What do you love on TV?
I loved Spooks so you can imagine my delight that my new series was called Secret Agent!

You can catch Secret Agent Thursdays at 8pm on Channel 4

Follow Phil on Twitter

Silk: There’s a new Q.C. in town

Where Whitechapel has police investigations and Silent Witness has Pathology, Silk has barristers at the top of their game battling against criminals, the law and sometimes each other.

If criminal and legal dramas are your thing you’ll love the second series of the BBC’s hard-hitting drama, Silk. On the other hand, if you’ve never watched a crime drama in your life, make this your first. You won’t be disappointed.

“This law show on BBC One has sucked me in. I was meant to change the Channel” one viewer tweets.

This view is hardly surprising when the BBC has managed to cram all the tension, courtroom jargon, and moral dilemmas of the previous series into the opening five minutes of its intriguing courtroom drama. Having said that, one shouldn’t really pigeon hole Silk as a courtroom drama, since a lot of the plot occurs outside the courtroom and within the confines of the chambers inhabited by our main characters.

Maxine Peake slips effortlessly back into the role.

Maxine Peake returns, somewhat triumphantly, as barrister Martha Costello, whose recent, successful Silk application has earned her the coveted position of Queen’s Counsel along with a new name plaque outside chambers. If you followed the first series, you’ll know all about Martha’s insatiable desire for justice, passion for her job and deeply charismatic character. You’ll also be glad to know that second time round Maxine Peake has fallen elegantly back into the role and is as confident and perceptive as ever.

Resident ladies’ man Clive Reader (Rupert Penry-Jones) rides, more boyishly than gallantly, into chambers on his new motorbike, sporting a leather jacket several decades too young for his 38-year old self, causing his colleagues to muse over a possible mid-life crisis. Unfortunately for Clive he arrives just in time to see his name being slid down the plaque to make way for Martha’s new title.

Cue many jealous stares, uncomfortable silences and malicious remarks. Or so you might think. However, one of the most refreshing things about this episode (and hopefully the rest of the series) is the development of Martha and Clive’s relationship. You begin to get a real sense of the trust in their friendship. It feels as though Clive’s character has evolved and matured since series one, as he tells Martha, “you look terrific”  in a sincere and thoughtful manner.  So it’s almost a relief when he follows up his comment with, “vintage lesbian; it’s a good look for you Martha”. Back to the sarcastic Clive we know and love.

In fact the whole episode is filled with laugh-out-loud moments; something you might not expect from a drama based on the British legal system, including a trial where the defendant is accused of gauging out a man’s eyes. Oh sorry, did I forget to say? Aside from all the job promotions and hilarious one-liners, there is actually a gritty plotline and some highly credible courtroom performances.

Billy is back on top.

As well as the return of the chambers’ two best barristers, viewers can look forward to the reappearance of the brilliant Neil Stuke as Senior Clerk, Billy, as well as bumbling South London lad Jake (Theo Barklem-Biggs) and quietly efficient John played by John MacMillan. It appears the whole ‘family’, as Billy puts it, is back together again. Almost.

For it seems that that Shoe Lane Chambers have not decided to keep pupils Niamh and Nick on the payroll. A shame, as their character relationships and legal innocence helped drive much of the plot in the first series. But before the viewer has much chance to lament over absent faces, in saunters solicitor Mickey Joy played by the ever compelling Phil Davis (Whitechapel) followed later on in the episode by the ‘vicious’ Q.C. (her words not mine) CW (Frances Barber) known worryingly as Lady Macbeth by her peers.

With a cast of this quality it’s hard to be anything other than completely captivated by some seriously brilliant performances. Particular highlights include Jake’s nervous chatter about the chambers loo-roll consumption to new, attractive Junior Clerk, Beth, Martha’s cigarette out the window (to avoid being arrested for ‘passive manslaughter’) of the robing room at court with Lady Macbeth and Clive’s slip of the tongue when asking a female solicitor for a drink; “Do you want to go for a quick a f**k? Drink! Jesus, sorry.”

Clearly praise should go also to the wonderful script of Peter Moffat. Moffat was a barrister before becoming a writer and he writes so truthfully about the world. This opening episode struck a perfect balance between personal and ethical predicaments, courtroom revelations and sharp, witty comedy showing this British drama to be one of the best on television.

And whilst at first it may seem that those of us without a degree in law might struggle to understand what on earth is going on, with terms such as ‘court mentions’ and ‘duress’ being thrown around willy nilly, this is certainly not the case. The refreshing thing about Silk is the relative simplicity of the plot. Much of the focus is on the inner workings of the chambers themselves and the characters’ interactions within their set; the competitiveness, the jealousy, the compassion and the sheer organisation of the whole thing.

So if you’re curious to find out how watching a bunch of narcissistic, competitive barristers squabble and bicker their way through the British legal system can make for compelling drama, turn your tellys to BBC1 at 9pm next Tuesday. And catch up on episode one if you missed it on BBC iPlayer now.

• Early ratings show Silk made a strong return with 5.63million viewers. 

Silk Continues Tuesday's at 9.00pm on BBC1

Contributed by Vicki Greenfield Follow Vicki on Twitter

Read our Interview with Neil Stuke
Buy Series One on DVD

The TVWEEK: Sunday 20th -Friday 25th May 2012

Sunday
9.00pm Channel 4's Comedy Gala Channel 4 - Headlining this year's extravaganza - filmed at London's 02 Arena in aid of Great Ormond Street Hospital - is Jessie J, who opens the show with an exclusive live performance. The all-star line-up also includes Lee Evans, Michael McIntyre, Jonathan Ross, Micky Flanagan, Sean Lock, Kevin Bridges, Jo Brand, Jack Whitehall, Jack Dee, Jon Richardson, Seann Walsh, Lee Nelson, Josh Widdicombe, Paul Chowdhry, Andi Osho, Keith Lemon and Alan Carr.
9.00pm The Survivors Five - Documentary about the people who survived Anders Behring Breivik's killing spree on July 22nd, 2011. Featuring testimony from survivors on Utoya Island and Oslo, this is a narrative of the events as they unfolded.
Monday
8.30pm Gok Cooks Chinese Channel 4 - Gok Wan is firing up his wok to showcase his other great passion in life: Chinese cooking. Growing up with a Chinese restaurateur and chef for a father, Gok loves nothing more than home-cooked Chinese food, and over the years has perfected many dishes of his own. Now he is joined by his beloved dad John, affectionately known as Poppa Wan, for this brand new cookery series exploring Chinese home cooking and healthy, quick meals devised by Gok himself - proving that he is master of the cleaver as well as the cleavage! In this first programme Gok guides viewers through the simple basics of Chinese cooking, from the 'holy trinity' of ingredients - garlic, ginger and spring onion - to the 'love box' of condiments. His first aim is to demonstrate how to cook the perfect egg fried rice: it's the fastest Chinese food anyone can master, from wok to plate in five minutes. Gok heads to Leicester to see his dad and rustle up a classic dish.

9.00pm The Fall of Singapore: The Great Betrayal BBC2 - This landmark film by Paul Elston tells the incredible story of how it was the British who gave the Japanese the knowhow to take out Pearl Harbor and capture Singapore. For 19 years before the fall of Singapore to the Japanese, British officers were spying for Japan. Worse still, the Japanese had infiltrated the very heart of the British establishment - through a mole who was a peer of the realm known to Churchill himself. 

9.00pm Are Fake Breasts Safe? BBC3 - Former Miss Great Britain, Gemma Garrett, investigates how she - and 50,000 other British women - ended up with toxic breast implants made by the French company PIP. 

Tuesday
7.30pm Trash to Treasure ITV - Documentary series about two reclamation yards in the north west of England.

9.00pm Harlots, Housewives and Heroines: A 17th Century History for Girls BBC4 - Historian Lucy Worsley immerses herself in the world of Restoration England, exploring the captivating lives of the women of the period.  

10.00pm My Big Fat Fetish Channel 4 - Fat girls eating food is becoming an underground internet activity. Magazines and online websites featuring 'Big Beautiful Women' have become more and more popular. These women love their fat bodies and there are millions of men around the world who admire them and are willing to pay to watch them eat online. My Big Fat Fetish follows the lives of four 'Big' models in the USA and UK.
10.00pm Hit and Miss Sky Atlantic - The Channel's first original UK drama series from acclaimed writer Paul Abbott. Oscar nominee Chloe Sevigny stars as an assassin with a secret, Mia's life is changed forever by a letter from her ex.
Wednesday
9.00pm Hitler's Children BBC2 - Documentary that looks at the descendants of the most powerful figures in the Nazi regime: men and women who were left a legacy that indelibly associates them with one of the greatest abominations in history. What is it like to have grown up with a name that immediately raises images of genocide?
9.00pm Euro's Most Shocking Moments BBC3 - Richard Bacon and David James count down the most inspirational, ridiculous and mind-blowing incidents from the last 20 years of football's European Championships, combining footage with anecdotes and memories.
10.35pm Soccer Aid 2012 ITV - Cat Deeley presents the first of three shows in the build-up to Soccer Aid 2012, the charity football match in aid of UNICEF. She chats to celebrities including England captain Robbie Williams and Hollywood star Mike Myers and catches up with the action from the training ground. Plus Keira Knightley reports from Chad on how the money raised can help.
Thursday
9.00pm National Treasures: Jubilee Special BBC1 - Special edition of the history magazine show presented by Dan Snow and Sian Williams. Filmed at Westminster Abbey, the programme celebrates Britain's royal past in the church which has witnessed more than a thousand years of pageantry and regal history.
9.00pm The Fish Market: Inside Billingsgate BBC2 - London's oldest wholesale market is on the verge of its biggest change in over a thousand years. Fish merchants are facing tough times. The market is under pressure to modernise and its iconic and ancient traditions are under threat. The job of the licensed fish porter, once a job for life, could be thrown open to all comers. The market is divided: will ancient custom or modern commerce win out?

9.30pm Don't Trust the B#### in Apartment 23 E4 - New US sitcom. Sweet, innocent June moves from rural Indiana to start a new life amid the bright lights of New York City. Things immediately turn sour when she finds her dream job no longer exists, thanks to a CEO who is wanted for embezzlement, leaving the company to shut down. In debt and on the streets, fresh-faced, trusting June thinks her luck has changed when she gets the chance to move in with party girl Chloe, who is a charming and vivacious roommate, at least on first impressions. However, it transpires that Chloe is a con artist with the morals of a viper who attempts to scam the newcomer out of her savings. Her partner in crime is her ex-boyfriend and best pal, actor James Van Der Beek. 

Friday

The Great British Story: A People's History BBC2 - Historian Michael Wood presents a series exploring the United Kingdom's remarkable past from the perspective of ordinary people. Travelling across Britain, Michael works with local communities, tapping into their extraordinary energy and knowledge, and exploring our unrivalled local and national archives. The first episode spans the period from the end of the Romans to the eighth century. It explores the crystallization of our regional identities in the Dark Ages, the legacy of Rome and the coming of the Anglo Saxons, the ancestors of the English.

Custardtv Live: US Shows and interview with Britain's Got Talent Winner

In our latest Live Podcast we spoke about the dwindling ratings of The Voice and the huge success of Britain's Got Talent and the shows axed and coming back from the US.

Britain DOES HAVE TALENT!: I can't even get my dog to sit!

I have never missed an episode of Britain's Got Talent. Never missed  an audition, never missed a semi-final, never missed a link from Ant &  Dec and never missed a open shirt moment from Simon Cowell. I remember how excited I was back in 2007 when the first series started. It seemed so different, fun and enjoyable. Opera singing dustman Paul Potts won that first series and I was hooked. What struck me about the  series back in 2007 was how patriotic and warm it felt. In 2007 X Factor and American Idol were still auditioning hopefuls in a glammed up but soulless hotel room, but Britain's Got Talent stuck their prospective acts on a stage in front of a live studio audience. 

In 2009 The X Factor followed suit, but back in 2007 this was a revolutionary idea. The idea was that the audience, with their cheers and jeers, became the fourth judge. Some acts were put through solely on the reaction from the audience who had presumably been doped up on fizzy drinks and chocolate before each show. The aspect of this live audience gave the show a different feel to any other talent show that was clogging up our channels back then. With Ant & Dec in the wings everything felt perfect.

2008 saw success for street dancer George Sampson who has since gone on to appear in films and TV series Waterloo Road but it was 2009 that Britain's Got Talent gained interest from around the world. I'm not going to describe in intricate detail the audition that saw Susan Boyle catapulted into mega stardom as it has since become one of those "JFK moments" where everyone remembers where they were when Susan belted out "I dreamed a dream" to an initially disinterested judging panel. Of course Susan came second that year with street dancers Diversity voted most popular by the public. I was one of those people a little left out by "Boylemania"; I wasn't as moved or as compelled to vote for Boyle but I did appreciate the fact that Britain's Got Talent was one the one show that would embrace an act like Boyle and lead her to the success she was deserving of.

By 2010 the format of Britain's Got Talent was over familiar and  though I remember being impressed by acrobatic winners Spellbound I also remember the series felt like it was losing its charm and steam.  Of course it isn't the fault of producers really as it's a rare series that doesn't lose its steam after four series.

The less said about the 2011 series the better. I enjoyed the inclusion of Michael McIntyre but the series and the judging panel  suffered from the lack of Simon Cowell. People are very vocal when  Cowell's name is mentioned but whatever you think of him, he knows how to put a great talent show together. Cowell knows what the public like, what the public expect and what the public get excited by and although he was still working as a producer on the series, his absence at the auditions was felt by auditionees  and the audience alike.

I hold my hand up and say I was less excited by the sixth series of Britain's Got Talent. I felt as if I'd seen it all before and although Cowell was returning to the panel I was sceptical about yet another  new judging panel. However, just like Cowell, I'm happy to admit when  I'm wrong. I had preconceptions about the series before I'd seen it and that's the one thing you should never do with a series like this. There was a lot of fuss made (by me too) about Britain's Got Talent competing with the BBC's new jewel The Voice. Some even suggested Cowell was concerned by the success of The Voice but in actual fact there's no question which was the more fun and more entertaining.

The new panel of David Walliams, Alesha Dixon, Simon and Amanda  clicked with instant chemistry and as an audience member I reveled in the fun they were having. Its a difficult thing to achieve but the series felt fresh again. This was, of course, an example of how well Simon Cowell knows things will work. The "refreshed" production was less in your face and took itself less seriously and because of that I was at ease and somewhat transported back to 2007 and reminded why I love the show so much in the first place.


Skip forward 7 weeks and we arrive at the final. It is fair to say  that the semi-finals were a mixed bag of talent and cringeworthy moments but that is what you've come to expect if you're a long time viewer like myself. What struck me on final night though was the diversity (pardon the accidental pun) and the sheer calibre of each of  the acts. Each one of them would have been deserving winners but one act stood out. Of course Jonathan and Charlotte were amazing and the  Loveable Rogues were so credible and new but it was dancing dog Pudsey I was most looking forward to.


You would have had to have a heart of stone not to be ooh and ahhring at the relationship between the two as they darted across the judges table. It was so nice to see such a genuine loving relationship between a 16 year old and her pet and everything Pudsey did amazed me and left my whole living-room in fits of laughter, applause and admiration. I don't want to be too over sentimental but I was overwhelmed at times by the amount of Talent displayed here and genuinely rooting for everyone. It was a night that did make me feel proud to be British and a night that  celebrated just how fantastic a medium television is and of course most importantly and without cynicism demonstrated more than ever that Britain DOES HAVE TALENT!

Watch their winning performance below..

The Apprentice: Why hasn't this series worked?

Guest Blogger Will Downes looks at the current run of the reality favourite.

Perhaps it’s all a facade, but it seems that The Apprentice is a fairly difficult thing to win. I’m always amazed  that anyone comes out the other side, their mouths still stretching into a smile as they are presented with their vague prize, which used to be a job, but now is the business equivalent of a book-voucher.


I used to hate what The Apprentice gave its winner; that job. Brilliant. Actually, a job is brilliant, but not when it’s a prize at the end of the TV show. It’s like winning a game of football and receiving an acre of the moon as a prize. “Give me three points!” the footballer cries. “Give me £100,000!” the Apprentice winner cries. Because that’s what the prize was, £100,000. It just happened to be strapped to a meaningless job in a sub-division of Amstrad.


But now the winner gets something that I can’t apply for here on the internet, a business partnership with Lord Alan of Sugar. It’s fairly excellent, really, a leap over Westminster Abbey for someone with a good enough idea. But from such reform has come a lesser show; a flimsy, episodic, forgettable show. 


There was a moment in Big Brother a few years back when they decided to show a few of the contestants their housemates’ audition tapes. It was wonderful and mean, an insight into the characters these people had created. The longer these shows go on, the more time prospective participants have to hone their pitch. Big Brother likes wacky individuals, and what the housemates saw were these archetypes of the show, exact photo-fits of what we had come to expect from a Big Brother contestant. But this presentation came as the competition was starting to wind down. They’d spent a lot of time with these people, learnt what was meant when they said they “were just being themselves”. It’s difficult to keep up the act, and once you’re in you’re in. It was no surprise that audition tape and reality were more than different.


The problem Big Brother has is that a large proportion of the show is made up of a group of people lounging around. Actually, The Apprentice has tried that this series. On more than one occasion it has begun with the contestants enjoying a game of table tennis, or chatting about how fellow-apprentice Ricky Martin’s wrestling background could well be a shoddy veil for an ironic love of Latin music. Either way, we’re supposed to believe that this competition takes over their lives. But the Apprentices are not on this show for the nice house and musical conversation, they are there to better their lives, or at the very least become minor celebrities...
.
..Introducing ‘You’re Fired’. I’ve avoided this show this series, despite it being a thoroughly pleasant half-hour. You see the issue with ‘You’re Fired’ is that it gives these people a platform to be a self-deprecating bunch who appear immeasurably embarrassed about being on the show. They shake their heads as the “expert” reveals their mis-calculations, poor marketing strategies and dismal sales pitches. They aren’t delusional, or at least most of them aren’t. They are presentable, coherent, intelligent individuals whose only apparent mistake is that they thought they could win The Apprentice. This is brilliant, a triumph, but I’ve just watched a group of delusional buffoons. What the hell happened to them?


Though my opinion of the prize has shot up, the mysterious business’  these people have outlined in the files only Lord Sugar, Karen Brady and Nick Hewer can see are unknown. We see their names and their current jobs, that’s it. What they have in mind would be a welcome addition. I’m assuming the people left have a business-plan Lord Sugar likes the look of, and interestingly it’s hard to see the same type of person making it so far had the programme stuck with the previous prize. It seems that Lord Sugar wants a nutty professor, a character whose creativity is the bastion of their drive and talent. Unfortunately, and I’m surprised about this, they don’t make for the best, and watchable people on television. Actors are actors because, usually, they can act. These people can’t, and it’s probably why they aren’t actors. The Apprentice beams from our television screens with sweeping shots over London, sincere talking heads, and a boss who’s perched high in a fake board-room. It wants to be a film, with actors and a baddie. It isn’t a film, it doesn’t contain actors, and I’ve read the guys Tweets.


I didn’t want my positive feelings about The Apprentice to have exhausted themselves with the contestants, and thankfully it seems that so much more has led to the show’s demise. Perhaps I’m just bored, looking back over the good times with an optimistic eye that will have faith in this show as long as it runs. But these things do go down-hill, and I’m afraid The Apprentice may have. I’ll tune in tonight, sure, but I already don’t care that much about it.


Contributed by Will Downes 
The Apprentice continues Wednesday's at 9.00pm on BBC1 with The Junior Apprentice set for the autumn.


Follow Will on Twitter.

The TVWEEK: Sunday 12th -Thursday 17th May 2012

Saturday
7.30pm Britain's Got Talent ITV - Final of the series.
Sunday 
8.00pm Starlings Sky1 - Brendan Coyle and Lesley Sharp star in this heart-warming comedy drama. The Starling family make way for a new addition to their already-hectic nest.
9.00pm Coast BBC2
Monday 
8.00pm Inside Facebook: Mark Zuckerberg's $100 billion Gamble BBC2 - As Facebook heads for its 100 billion dollar flotation, Emily Maitlis updates her recent documentary on the prospects for Mark Zuckerberg's social network phenomenon. She examines how Facebook, now with 900 million users, plans to earn the billions its new investors will expect from it. With exclusive access to Mark Zuckerberg and senior executives, Emily tells the Facebook story, and reports on its challenge - to build its advertising business from the personal information its users provide, without losing their trust.
9.00pm Chatsworth BBC1 - Three-part documentary series detailing life of the new aristocracy over Chatsworth's entire 2011 season. For the first time ever, the palace of the peaks, Chatsworth House in Derbyshire, has opened its doors to the cameras for a whole year. It is a unique opportunity to take an in-depth glimpse of life upstairs and downstairs in the 21st century. The first programme joins the 12th duke and duchess as the house is being prepared to open to the public. It is the busiest time of year for the house staff and everyone has a role to play - even the duke and duchess, as they join the annual litter pick around the estate. 2011 sees the six month probation period of the youngest and very first female head guide, Heather Redmond. Will she win over the 60-strong guide team, some of whom have worked at Chatsworth since before she was born, and get the job for keeps?
9.00pm 56 Up ITV - Three-part documentary continuing the acclaimed Seven Up! series.
9.00pm Secret Millionaire Channel 4 - New series of the reality series that sees a brand new millionaire go undercover.

9.00pm The 16 Year-Old Killer: Cyntoia's Story BBC3 - In 2004, Cyntoia Brown was arrested for the murder of a 43-year-old man. Cyntoia was a prostitute and he was her client. Film-maker Daniel Birman was granted unique access to Cyntoia from the week of her arrest, throughout her trial and over a period of six years. His documentary explores the tragic events in her life that led up to the murder, and Cyntoia's biological mother meets her daughter for the first time since giving her up for adoption 14 years earlier.

10.00pm The Walking Dead Five - Series 2 of the acclaimed US zombie drama.

Tuesday

9.00pm Silk BBC1 - Second series of the law drama starring Maxine Peake, Rupert Penry-Jones and Neil Stuke. Martha Costello takes her first case as Silk and Billy meets his match.

9.00pm Dirty Britain ITV - First in a two-part documentary in which the dirty secrets about the way modern Brits live are revealed by the filthy work of the men and women who clean up after us. A pair of Manchester sewermen share their first-hand knowledge of the nation's poor diet, an event cleaner offers insight into how Brits behave in a crowd at Cheltenham Racecourse and two window cleaners face the terrifying task of keeping a huge national icon absolutely spotless. Meanwhile, a team of extreme cleaners in Berkshire faces one of the most extraordinary house clearances of their careers, pest controller Jim goes into battle with an infestation of bedbugs and, on one of the largest landfills in Europe, the workers do their best to hide the gigantic quantities of junk the nation produces. 

10.00pm Sex, Lies & Rinsing Guys Channel 4 

Wednesday

8.00pm DIY SOS: The Big Build BBC1

8.00pm Lewis ITV - Sixth series of the crime drama series starring Kevin Wheatley. When botanist Liv Nash accidentally digs up the body of the recently buried Murray Hawes, Lewis and Hathaway are set upon a seemingly impossible quest. Murray was a man possessed, fixated upon solving an impossible riddle by Lewis Carroll. But could his obsession have been dangerous enough to get him killed? 

8.00pm Secret Eaters Channel 4 - Anna Richardson exposes the country's secret eating habits, one household at a time. Each episode helps people who are mystified as to why they're piling on the pounds. To uncover what they're really eating and shine a light on their dietary downfalls, they'll agree to undergo around-the-clock surveillance for five days.  

9.00pm Felicity Kendal's Indian Shakespeare Quest BBC2 - Long before she set foot on stage in England, Felicity Kendal launched her acting career in India, where her parents ran a theatre company called Shakespeareana. Here she returns to the land of her childhood to discover the full story of India's enduring love-affair with Shakespeare - from the first days of Empire to Bollywood and beyond. Shaped by her enthusiasm to discover more about a drama in which her own family played a role, Felicity's journey takes her to India's iconic cities and to places far off the beaten track. Along the way she meets film stars and prisoners, kings and market traders, school-children, historians and her own relatives, in sees how Shakespeare's plays are inspiring a new generation of artists and film-makers in modern India. 

9.00pm 24hrs in A&E Channel 4 - Second series of the RTS award-winning documentary series.Filmed around the clock for six weeks at King's College Hospital in south London, one of Britain's busiest A&E departments, each programme focuses on people treated within the same 24-hour period. The first episode kicks off during the morning rush hour, meeting workers who set off on their daily commute but find themselves fighting for their lives in the skilful hands of the A&E team. Two cyclists arrive with serious head injuries. IT analyst Christopher hit a log on his way to work, and concerns are raised when scans show a bleed on his brain. Meanwhile, Brighton cyclist Sarah swerved to avoid a pedestrian when riding at 30mph downhill without a helmet. 

Thursday

9.00pm The Great Euro Crash with Robert Peston BBC2 - With Europe teetering on the edge of an economic precipice, BBC business editor Robert Peston takes a long view of the euro - from Churchill's vision of a United States of Europe to the bail-outs of Greece, Portugal and Ireland. Meeting a property developer in Ireland, a taxi driver in Rome and a German manufacturing worker, the film exposes the high cost being paid by European workers today for the dream of monetary union - and how close Europe came to a complete banking meltdown.  

9.00pm The Executives ITV2 - Six aspiring journalists compete for the chance to win their dream job with one of Europe's largest magazine publishers. This week, rookies Hayley, Stuart, Sunny, Felix, Ellie and Christopher report for duty at More! Magazine

The Custardtv Live: Semi Finals and Sickness

The latest LIVE podcast where Gary and I discuss Britain's Got Talent, the slow demise of The Voice and we ask What do you watch when you're ill?

Thecustard Chats to Neil Stuke ahead of series 2 of Silk on BBC1

Tuesday (15th May) sees the return of Silk on BBC1. The law series starring Maxine Peake, Rupert Penry-Jones and Neil Stuke proved hugely popular in 2011. I recently got the chance to speak with actor Neil Stuke (One Night, Reggie Perrin, Game On) about returning to his role as crooked Head of Chambers Billy Lamb. Neil told me about what we can expect from series 2, how he found working with Phil Davies and the possible return of his 90's sitcom Game On.


Were you surprised by the success of the first series or was there a feeling that Silk would be a hit?
It was a pleasant surprise but its such good quality. The writing's so good and people are always desperate for a bit of good writing these days.

At the end of the last series Billy seemed on the verge of loosing everything but at the start of episode 1 of series 2 he appears to have bounced back. Are things any easier for him this series?
It's a tough series for Billy this one he's got all sorts of challenges being thrown at him so I wouldn't say things get easier for Billy by any stretch of the imagination.

Now that Martha has Silk and Clive doesn't how does Billy's attitude toward both characters change?
Well Clive (Rupert Penry-Jones character) was involved in possibly setting up a rival set and Billy doesn't really forgive him for being involved in that and going behind his back so Billy doesn't really give Clive an easy ride in this series.

As an audience member its often difficult to tell when Billy is being genuine. How would you describe his methods and do you ever find it difficult playing those scenes?
Well we often use the word Machiavellian and we talk about Iago from Othello quite a lot but first and foremost he lives and breathes the chambers so he'll do anything to protect his lawyers really and not all of it is above board. 

Was it easier coming back for series 2?
It was very interesting actually. I was first up on the first morning of shooting and it was all completely different crew and completely different producers so it was quite interesting. I stood there thinking how do I do this but after the first few hours you're straight back into it. He's a very contained character.  I like to play him so that you never really know how he's feeling which is quite an interesting thing to do as an actor.


This series sees the arrival of big new characters played by Phil Davies (Whitechapel) and Frances Barber. what were they like to work with?
Well it's slightly terrifying working with Phil and I mean that in the nicest possible way.  I've spent most of life trying to act like Phil Davies so yeah it was interesting choice. Obviously working with Frances Barber was amazing so we're surrounded by the cream of the crop really.  


The scenes between you and Phil are quite tense. Do you watch yourself on screen?
I do watch it. We get sent it and we're asked what our opinions are and I'm very pleased with the scenes between Phil and I. It is hard though because he really is incredibly good 


And a little bit scary?
Yeah! Definitely!


Who is affected most by Martha's promotion to Silk?
It hurts Clive the most. She's obviously getting better work and that's very frustrating for him.


You were quite openly critical about the scheduling of your other recent BBC1 drama One Night but were you happy with the feedback and praised that it did receive?
I think everyone involved in it was disappointed and from what I can gather the audience where disappointed by how late it was on but I think we all knew it was going to get critical acclaim because it was so well written and so beautifully directed and apart from myself very well acted. There were lots of actors who hadn't really acted before who were just extraordinary. I'm not going to harp on about how disappointed I am but certainly it was a mistake. 


When I mentioned I was talking to you a lot of people bought up Game On. Do you have a preference between comedy and drama?
I like mixing the two. Everybody always forgets how much theater I do but I do a hell of a lot of comedy theater. I enjoy comedy because you can make people laugh and there's nothing better than that. I like both I really do and I'm very lucky that I can do both because there's plenty of straight actors out there who want to do comedy so I'm very blessed that I get to do both. It is  extraordinary the reaction I still get from Game On  after all these years. 


Is it odd when you see a repeat or catch clip of YouTube of Game On?
I think it's great! I thought it was an absolutely fantastic programme but it is frustrating when people only talk about Game On. I mean it was soooo long ago and I don't mean to be rude and I don't think people realise that as an actor you put that to bed and move on. Silk is my thing at the moment so the idea of having to talk about Game On is really odd. Having said that, Sam and I are discussing bringing it back. Sam (Samantha Womack) has been in touch with the writer and the original producers.


That might be a bit of a scoop then
Yeah it might be nice to see how enthusiastic people are about that but as I said to another journalist it could be a disaster.


What are you working on at the moment?
I'm working with Steven Berkoff on his new play. Six actors in search of a director a brand new play from Berkoff working with the man himself.


Do you hope Silk returns for a third series?
I don't think there's any doubt that will be back for a third series


What do you love on television?
Well.. I don't watch much TV (Laughs) I'll be really honest. My favourite programme was Monty Hall's Fisherman's Apprentice I love anything he does and I love cookery shows so the greedy Italians is just fantastic and Grandma's House! I think Simon Amstell is just brilliant in that.


It is brilliant isn't it? But sadly they've decided they don't want to anymore of Grandma's House I think which is a real shame
Insanity reigns at the BBC I can assure you.


Most actors I speak to say they don't watch TV. Why do you think that is?
We're always out! 


Silk Returns Tuesday 15th May 9pm on BBC1


Follow Neil on Twitter
Buy Silk Series One on DVD
Our interview with One Night writer Paul Smith

Homeland: I don't believe it!

Am I the only person in Britain watching Homeland who can’t see what all the fuss is about?

The US drama has brought in impressive ratings for Channel 4 in its Sunday-night slot. My colleagues at Radio Times are smitten. Over in America, it boasts fans as diverse as Lindsay Lohan and President Barack Obama.

“Allow it one episode and you’ll be hooked,” warned RT’s David Butcher of the “smart, shadowy and nuanced” thriller series.

I wasn’t hooked. I was frustrated.

I’d started out with such high hopes for the show. It had a good writing pedigree. Its two leads, Claire Danes and Damian Lewis, had turned in mesmerising performances in previous projects. The plot was intriguing (marine Nicholas Brody returns to the United States after being held hostage by al-Qaeda in Iraq and Afghanistan for eight years. But is he a hero – or the enemy?).

Maybe my hopes were too high. Because for me, the series never really gelled.

The central implausibility – that a man who’d endured nearly a decade of physical and psychological torture wouldn’t be offered rather more than just a quick, off-screen chat with a psychiatrist – fatally overshadowed the first few episodes. It’s hard to get drawn into a drama when your brain is doing its best Victor Meldrew impersonation – “I don’t BELIEVE it!”

And if that wasn’t enough of an irritation, then there was Danes playing “bipolar”. As CIA analyst Carrie Mathison, she’d supposedly kept her condition a secret from her superiors for years.

Danes, however, wasn’t given the chance to convince the audience, let alone her bosses, she didn’t have a problem – she was hyper from the word go. And what a one-note performance it was: the flick of the hair, the pout, the panicky eyes soon became maddeningly familiar.

I spotted the mid-series plot twist (Brody’s fellow POW, the man he thought he’d murdered, was still alive and planning a political assassination) long before it limped into plain sight. Chuck in some gratuitous female nudity and it all starts to look a little dull.

As I watched, I thought back fondly to the heyday of 24. You remember. Those first few series where, when the hour was up, you were tortured by the realisation that you had to wait a whole week to find out what happened next! I never experienced that feeling with Homeland.

Given all that, you’re probably wondering why I’m still watching. Well, that’s simple. Damian Lewis. He is just as compelling here as he was in Lodge Kerrigan’s 2004 movie, Keane (the performance that reportedly convinced Homeland’s creators they had to cast him). In it, he played a father apparently trying to come to terms with his daughter’s disappearance, but while sympathising with his jittery plight, the audience was continually questioning his motives and his sanity – just as we do in Homeland.

Also, I want to find out who the mole is. My money’s on Estes as the person who slipped Brody’s former guard a razor blade – but I’ll probably be proved wrong. So long as Virgil’s in the clear, though, I’m happy – it’s been a joy to see Due South’s David Marciano wisecracking on my TV screen once more.

Maybe tonight’s episode of Homeland will be the one that makes me a believer. Perhaps it will be a finale so explosive I’ll re-evaluate all that went before. I might even utter the words: “I can’t wait for series two!” Just like with Brody, you’ll have to wait and see…  

They are currently shooting the second season in the States and no doubt the majority of people will be aching for more once this series does come to a suitably dramatic conclusion. I guess I'm just disappointed that I shan't be one of them.

Contributed by Laura Pledger Follow Laura on Twitter